Recently a client and I discussed the best way to introduce oneself to people one wished to ally with.
Building trust early is key to successful alliances. So your introduction should make them trust you.
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You build trust by demonstrating Credibility, Reliability, Intimacy, and low Self-orientation.
This takes time - so the earlier you start, the better.
Here's how you can demonstrate these 4 factors in your very first conversation with someone:
Credibility is about whether you are qualified. In your introduction, include credentials, experience etc to show you are the right person for the job
Reliability is about consistency, doing what you say. It's difficult to demonstrate reliability within a single interaction - however, you can plant the seeds. Commit to something, and follow through.
Intimacy is about emotional connection. The best way to connect emotionally is to be vulnerable. Share something that is personal, and shows your fallibility.
Make the conversation about them. The more you keep the spotlight on them, the less Self-oriented you appear.
If you feel resistance - if this feels artificial and inauthentic - it's because you have yet to cultivate the habit.
Your goal is to become the person for whom these behaviours are natural.
