Most people are afraid to speak their mind due to fear of rejection, or for fear it might make others feel threatened and evoke harmful reactions.
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Speaking your mind without fear shows you to be a confident and authentic person.
It makes you more attractive and influential, and more likely to succeed in life and in your career.
Yet, this is a rare quality: most people are afraid to speak their mind.
The main reason we are afraid to speak up is a fear of rejection.
This is hard-wired into us from the times when rejection by one's group meant certain death.
We also hesitate to speak up when we are afraid it might trigger in others, a perception of threat and evoke reactions that hurt us, hurt them, or hurt the relationship.
The best way to overcome our fear of rejection is to shine the light of logic on our fear - more often than not, it simply evaporates.
The way to avoid triggering harmful reactions from others is to explicitly address and assuage triggers such as status, certainty, autonomy, relatedness, or fairness.
For example, to reassure someone you are not threatening their status, start with: "I don’t mean to challenge your right to decide this, but it's important to me I share what I feel"
The next time you find yourself unwilling to speak up, ask why.
Overcoming your fear of rejection, and reassuring others you are not a threat is the key to getting better at speaking up.
